Sneaky Sneaky!

It’s been a busy few weeks! High stress ups and downs, good and bad! Changes in weather! Mass change in physical activity. Just a lot more of everything and my body isn’t used to it. Ps- add in the diet change of junk food on vacation…

I should have expected it, maybe I kind of expected it but forgot about it.

Today I didn’t feel good at all and got progressively worse. I updosed due to the pain, I thought was a fibro flare from all of the activity, and heck it might have started that way, a flare I mean.

I hadn’t ate anything all day and couldn’t get up to fix dinner so hubby got us take out- yea more junk- but I didn’t feel like cooking.

After eating I get sick and stumble for the bathroom like I do after every meal. It usually stops there. A mass explosion of my stomach contents then I’m better.

That wasn’t the case tonight, I got shaky, continued getting sick, confusion set in. I popped a stress dose of meds between trips to the bathroom. I knew this wasn’t good.

Luckily, I caught it before it went crisis. Although I’m not sure how because I wasn’t watching for Cortisol symptoms. Why? Because I wasn’t stressed out, no new injury, just another day in the life of a chronic hot mess.

Sneaky sneaky is what Addison’s Disease is.

Without warning my cortisol levels dropped. Or maybe I had been experiencing the warnings all day but blamed other illnesses for the pain and brain fog, the speech problems, the need to sleep all day. I should have recognized the symptoms, but I wasn’t paying attention to how AI symptoms feel different from the others.

My point of this post is 1. To pay attention to the symptoms. And 2. Things can get bad quickly.

So that’s all I have. It was all much scarier in person than it reads in this post, but trust me, it could get so bad so quick and without much warning. Pay attention.

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Shoe Shopping~ Randomness

So many of my friends love shoes, shoe shopping, all things shoes!

Not me!

I hate it!

On vacation and forgot my walking shoes, I tried making it the week without them. Tried. To much pain and now the humidity is increasing. So my amazing and supportive hubby took me to get some.

First let me tell you…

I was to sick to eat breakfast. Was touring a Wildlife safari during the 2:30 med time and didn’t want to take a 3rd dose on an empty stomach… by 3:00pm I hadn’t ate yet, was late for meds, hadn’t had a nap, been up since 6:30am, was hot… you get the picture…

let’s go shoe shopping!

I was actually excited because I kept hearing rave review about a couple different pairs that are said to help with pain-yada-yada!

Excitedly I pick the one I want. Try them on. Oh so soft. Then I walk… my heels nearly come out of the shoe. I try to convince myself they will work. These will not work.

I try on the other brand… (Repeat the above paragraph!) These will not work.

I try on a few others.

  • To tight
  • To narrow
  • Not my size
  • Ugly
  • Tight spots
  • Hard to get on
  • No room to swell

The shoes were piling up. I was getting tired. Depressed.

I have wide feet and wear a size 11, not easy to find. But add in I need a taller heel coverage so my feet stay in them. I need the extra padding. I need easy to get on. You know the story.

Finally, I’m angry, near tears! I want to leave barefoot- I don’t even want to wear the ones I wore into the store. I want to leave.

Hubby suggested (not the first time) that I try a men’s shoe. In a fit I agreed.

They fit. Comfortably.

I wanted white. They didn’t have white! I wanted girly! I wanted feminine.

I got navy blue.

Then socks. I wanted girly. I wanted feminine.

We searched and searched (even hungrier, even more tired, even lower on medication) for cute girly LARGE socks.

I got men’s gray.

By this point I am mad! Frustrated. We purchased the shoes and socks. I pushed the “Boys shit” (men’s socks and shoes) into the back seat, ranting about I’m not worthy to be a woman, I’m to fat, I’m to this, I’m to that…

a full blown fit.

I don’t want those stupid boys shoes.

Real grown up right.

Finally at 4:30pm we went to dinner, I took my meds, a couple hours later I kick the lid off the shoe box and stare at them. My heart is broke because I wanted to be a “normal woman” and feminine. I wanted to not need special shoes.

I put on one of those stupid socks.

I slid my foot into one of those stupid shoes.

Aweeeee.

I love these shoes! My feet love these shoes!

But…

Medicated or not. Tired or not. Hungry or not.

I do not like shoe shopping.

I do not like shoe shopping here or there.

I do not like shoe shopping anywhere.

I do not care if my feet are bare, I will not like shoe shopping.

So what did I get? Men’s Nike Free RN Flyknit 2018. They are light weight, the material Hugs my heels so they don’t slip out, the padding is pretty good, they aren’t tight anywhere.