Upside Down~

Upside down or inside out, backwards, maybe sideways, I have no idea how to even describe it. It is definitely strange! I don’t even know what it is! 

Blah- let’s start at the beginning, so the doctor started me on Adderall on Monday; I did not nap on Tuesday! The Adderall did not seem to help with the brain fog! So 1pt for Adderall 1pt for Chronic-ness. Yesterday  I did not take the Adderall first thing when I woke up and I was napping my 9:30am, a 4.5 hour nap, not sure who gets points there. 

One thing I have noticed, is that between 3-4 am on the mornings after taking Adderall, I am woke with a severe headache, I take my HC and the headache eases off! So I wonder… the Adderall is giving me more energy to do more, is that consuming more Cortisol too? 

Oh, back to the Inside Out/ Upside Down, it’s a catch 22 to have so much energy but suffer one of the worst hangover headaches of my life the next morning. The nausea comes in waves, shaky and pain are brutal to wake up to. So is it worth it? Will it get worse as more medication gets in my system? 

Oh and, yes I have a very bad short term memory, but usually with some coaxing I can vaguely jog the memory. But yesterday I talked to my son for 20 minutes, even approved him calling my dr— boy was I fuming this morning when they “returned your sons phone call,” when I didn’t even know my son was calling- that’s righ absoulotely no recall of talking to him yesterday. Same thing happened with texting, I do not recall texting most of the people my phone says I text with yesterday. 

So is this all related to the new medication or is this something new? I am so confused about being happy about the new med or to trash it because it just isn’t worth it, is it? I have no idea. 

Some part of me wonders if my memory is always this bad and I just cannot remember it. 😂

Oh I don’t know what to think. 

As I type this my eyes grow heavy, is that because I was up at 3am with the headache? On the Adderall should I still be able to sleep? I have I mentioned that I am extremely uncomfortable with this medication? 

Anyway, I’m saying not of any importance, but I appreciate you reading! I hope you have a wonderful day!!!

Blessings! 

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