This time of year is hard for so many people, it has been engrained in us that holidays are a time for family, but for some it isn’t.
”Tis the season… that lack of family, for whatever reason, is highlighted, BIG AND BOLD, and it hurts. A lot. Rather the choice is ours or not, it doesn’t matter, it still hurts.
“…still hurts when I get reminded of it during this season.” My son, age 20, reflecting on what a black sheep of any family he is. He tries to act like family doesn’t matter, because they have let him down so much, but family is what he really wants most. As his mother it breaks my heart to see the way grandparents (step and biological) treat him and leave him out.
I’ve decided that I have seasonal allergies, I’m allergic to the holiday season, the fake family get togethers that stress everyone out and stab each other in the back faster than a 3 year old unwraps the gifts. My symptoms are watery eyes (I’m not crying,) shaky (I’m not mad,) hole in tongue (I’m not biting my tongue,) unable to control volume when I talk (I’m not yelling,) Insomnia (so I can lay here thinking of all things I wish I would have said.)
Yes, these seasonal allergies are bad! I’m allergic to the BS that goes into judgemental, critical, two faced, family gatherings. (This is why they don’t like me, I’m real, fake people do not like real people because the truth comes out!)
And social media, don’t even get me started about the damage that can do this time of year! Some idiot driving home the fact of who is or is not liked in the family and posting it for the world to know, as they smile innocently like they had no idea what was done. Awe- bless your heart!
This post started with a caring concern and has turned into an eruption of bitterness, anger, and hurt.
To all of you struggling with seasonal allergies, you are not alone! The holidays will pass and things will go back to normal. Stay strong and don’t let them get to you! You are loved! You are worthy! You are important!
Friends are the family we choose! Family is not always blood!